Another year has come and gone. Midnight came, the ball dropped, and 2017 went the way of yesterday. 2017 was a quiet year for my little family, a resting, healing, rebuilding, waiting kind-of-year. At the same time this past year was challenging, stretching, and a bit awkward. Why awkward? Sometimes, at least for me, the gap and silence carved by waiting can leave a wake that is both disorienting and confusing. Sitting silent on the bench is hard and yet it is also a necessary part of the journey. To this end I remind myself that 2017 was a season, much like the bitter hard realities that 2016 and my dad’s cancer were.
So it’s a New Year
Everywhere I turn there are lists of resolutions to chase. Better health, job, family, and business goals just to name a few. There are lists of new books to read, amounts of books to read, time to better spend and time not to waste. We pursue moral goals, character goals, and academic goals. Self-improvement goals know no-end. Don’t get me wrong. They are good goals to have. But too often, like the predictability of the ball drop each year, New Year’s resolutions get dropped right along with it. I’ve been asked on more than one occasion if I have any New Year’s resolutions. To be honest, I’ve never been one to jump on the resolution list bandwagon. While I do have many goals, (one of which is to write more consistently), most hit hollow notes that are so shallow and self-focused they don’t resonate well.
So What Is My New Year’s Resolution?
Put simply, it is to have less of me and more of God. If there is anything that 2016 taught that 2017 had to process it is that time is short. Even as that last sentence was written, I realize I may not see 2019, or tomorrow for that matter. None of us live with that kind of guarantee or certainty.
I am keenly reminded of how true the above is, and how differently Christmas could have looked this year. Just one week prior to Christmas I was driving back from a class that I almost didn’t make it home from. Another car merged into my lane and nearly into me. Without a second thought I over-compensated at the steering wheel. Not once, but multiple times. For the next several yards in what felt like a slowed time warp my car swayed and swerved on dry asphalt as if it were on ice. I quite nearly rolled my car into and off a guard rail going 65 mph. That I didn’t is nothing short of a miracle. Instead, I pulled into home safe and sound. It must have been quite the confusion for my excited little man to open the door and see mom break down in immediate and free-flowing but very grateful tears.
I want less and more this year.
There is so much more to life than eating, working, sleeping and repeating the same cycle until we are given no more days to do so. There is more to gain than success and so much more to do than simply look inward. My goal is to look up. In looking up, there is God, the I AM, the beginning and the end. In looking up, there is strength, hope, and revival our lives desperately need. I love Psalms 69:32;
When the humble see it they will be glad; you who seek God, let your hearts revive.
And yet again another beautiful promise to those that seek the Lord is found in Psalm 34:8-10;
Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good! Blessed is the man who takes refuge in him! Oh, fear the Lord, you his saints, for those who fear him have no lack!
So, I want less of me and more of Him. Jesus didn’t come to us with the goal to gain, He came to serve, give, and save. Christ came humble and He came obediently. He came as a fulfillment of a promise in the most unexpected way. He is everything I need more than anything I could resolve to pursuit this side of heaven. So I look up, seeking to pursue Him, who holds all things, including myself, together. This is the New Year’s resolution I want most to stick, not just this year, but all the way to the very end until I see God face-to-face. This is the resolution I believe will impact all the rest more than I could ever endeavor to do in my own strength.
Lord, please, let there be less of me and more of YOU this year. Amen!