“Jesus wept.” — John 11:35
“Heaven knows we never need to be ashamed of our tears, for they are rain upon the blinding dust of earth, overlying our hard hearts.” – Great Expectations, Charles Dickens
Goodbyes are not easy. In grief, I snuck away to the grocery store alone and wept all the way home. Thoughts of my fur baby weighed heavy on my heart. Our beloved cat, who had been with us for 18 years, was signaling it was time to say goodbye.
On one hand I felt silly. “This is just a pet, an animal we’re talking about. It’s not like someone died.” Yet Bandit’s presence was significant. His stamp on my heart warranted tears. Bandit had navigated life’s transitions with my husband and me since the early days of our marriage. Sickness, infertility, adoption, new homes, births and deaths; Bandit had been there for it all. Our four-legged ball of fur had brought so much comfort and happiness over the years. Letting go meant saying farewell to a simple source of joy in my life.
“When we love deeply, we mourn deeply; extraordinary grief is an expression of extraordinary love. Grief and love mirror each other; one is not possible without the other.” —Joanne Cacciatore
Even Jesus wept.
Two powerful words that embrace my heart with comfort when I grieve. God with skin on wept for his beloved friend Lazarus who died. Jesus understood painful goodbyes. He also points the way to unshakable hope. Christ’s own death and resurrection demonstrate death does not have the final say.
On this side of heaven, not all is right in the world. Evidence of brokenness abounds. Pain is present everywhere. Even the whole of creation groans and waits eagerly for the day God will right all wrong (Rom. 8:19-22). Rest assured that day will come. Everything upside down in this world will be righted because God expressed extraordinary love on our behalf through the sacrifice of His son.
On days my heart feels heavy and choked, knowing God will one day wipe all tears brings tremendous comfort. I take solace knowing God sees me. God knows my tears, and God has acted. God’s love toward me is steadfast, even when I feel unheard. Martha and Mary’s pleas for help must have seemed ignored as their brother lay dying, yet Christ knew the bigger picture. Christ knew death would not have the final say.
Bandit of course was not Lazarus. While my boys pray God will give our fur friend a place in Heaven, I know this isn’t the case. Animals are not created in God’s image like people are. Yet God did place Bandit in our lives to be cared for, loved, and nurtured. Rather than feeling silly over shedding tears for a beloved pet, I pray for a soft heart. I pray my boys would continue to have soft hearts, able to express deep love and mourn deeply; even for simple things in life like the pleasure of a pet. I pray for a deeper understanding of who God is when my heart hurts. I pray I would never refuse to embrace the need for tears. Even Jesus wept.
Tears are good. Tears are cleansing. Tears keep my heart tender and help me look to Christ.
